Habits Help Define Us

Old Habits - New Habits signpost in a desert road backgroundDid you know that your brain is programmed for efficiency? It will naturally find a way to turn routine actions into habits so the brain can rest more often.

I learned this as I went through Charles Duhigg‘s book The Power of Habit. It’s not a new book – been out for a few years – but my list of books is so large I have to vacillate between older and newer books I read or listen to or simply peruse.

So your brain creates habits out of routine. Sometimes that is good and sometimes not so good. One of the things I got from Duhigg’s book is that the way to defeat a less desirable habit is to break the routine by choosing different actions and rewards. It is something that requires daily effort to establish or destroy habitual behaviors, whether good or bad.

What Are You Doing Today?

John Maxwell says that “The secret of your success is determined by your daily agenda.” In other words, success as a leader means that you are establishing habits through your daily routine and the decisions and priorities you make. Becoming a great leader is a process and not a momentary flash of brilliance.

The more we establish daily practices of leadership behaviors we create routines. These routines then lead to habits. We find ourselves unconsciously doing the right things and adding value to our people.

[tweetthis]Becoming a great leader is a process and not a momentary flash of brilliance.[/tweetthis]

Four Every Day Habits for Leaders

1. Growing 1%

Now here is a real challenge for us. We KNOW we need to be working on our growth yet we tend to relegate it to the “spare moments” of our time. How much spare time do you find yourself with during the workweek? Yeah, me too.

So if finding spare time is not a real possibility, then logically (and emotionally) the only real alternatives are to schedule it in as a priority or do absolutely nothing.

Doing nothing carries substantial penalties.

When we DO work on our growth, it is usually in frantic spurts of energy, unfortunately followed by extended periods of inactivity. The results are less effective because we get it in so rarely and want to therefore get through as much as we can. It overwhelms us and the outcome is that we remember practically nothing. Certainly we didn’t apply it.

Instead of overwhelm, we apply the principle of elephant eating. You have probably heard the old maxim, “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time!” That’s the secret here. Just focus on activities EVERY DAY that help you grow just 1% a day. Read a few chapters of a non-fiction book, such as a leadership book, or one on relationships, or a biography. Practice a skill you are trying to master. Just focus on the routine of the 1% growth and create the habit.

Just remember it must be intentional and it must be scheduled.

2. Looking for Good

As leaders our instinct is to walk in and find out what’s going wrong and what needs to be fixed. We spend too much time on the problems. We lose sight of all the people who really fix the problems and keep things going.

So instead of going in looking for problems to solve develop the routine of looking for people to compliment. As the saying goes, “catch people doing good.” When they do the right thing at the right time, when they go the extra mile, when they soothe over a customer, when they help a teammate out. Look for the behaviors you want them to repeat. Immediately then make a point of recognizing it according to the individual’s comfort level. Some folks, like me, want to be recognized publicly and loudly for the good things they have done; others prefer a quiet “well done“.

The results of this will be a brighter outlook for you on the day and a boost in morale not just for the individual employee but for those around them as well. Think what it would be like if your employees were all striving for a compliment from you. Sure, you may end up spending an inordinate amount of time complimenting people but if you can think of better things to do with your time then you need to go back to Leadership 101.

3. Meeting One-on-One

Tilt view silhouette of two people meeting one-on-oneLeaders need to be able to care about their people enough to be open to connect with them. Without caring, you can’t connect. Without connecting, you can’t influence. Without influence, you can’t lead.

You learn to care by spending time one-on-one getting to know them better. Ask questions and then….shut up and listen. Ask about their dreams, their family, what they do in their spare time. So each day you meet with one person to listen to them talk about their favorite subject – themselves.

This needs to be a daily habit because leaders need to keep in the know. Things change. We often have to be reminded of what we learned before. They need to know you mean it; that you truly care and it is worth keeping in touch regularly. It doesn’t need to take more than 15-30 minutes of your time each day and yet pays huge dividends.

4. Ridding Yourself of Work

So where will you find the time to work on personal growth, compliment others, and meet with individuals? Simple. Find something in your work load every day that you can hand out to someone else to do.

You see, as leaders most of our wasted time during the day is doing things that someone else could do just as well or possibly even better. In fact, experts estimate we spend 80% of our time doing that. We have held on to them for various reasons; because we enjoy it or because we have always done it or even for the sense of control it gives us.

Spending time doing things others could do takes away from our ability to do things only we can do or should do. Therefore, each day find something to get rid of and lighten your load.

By The Way

One quick note on what you read here.  I attempt to add value to you with what I write.  I choose my topics based on

  • what people tell me
  • what I think I would like to hear
  • what I read
  • what I need to hear myself.  I figure if I need to hear it, perhaps you do too!

If you want me to talk about a topic you haven’t seen or go into more detail about one, drop me a message. Unless you tell me otherwise, I’ll even publicly recognize you for the great idea! Just email me at psimkins(at)BoldlyLead.com.

Your Best As a Leader Depends on Your Questions

We love answers! We want to know! Why has the term “Google It” become so popular? Because it is a quick and easy way to find answers. Type in a phrase or keyword and in a flash Google gives you results. Lots of results!

Outside of Google, how do we find the answers we seek?

We ask questions.

Questions Get to the Basics

When I took a class in journalism at the University of Central Florida (GO KNIGHTS!) they emphasized that a journalist always seeks to find answers to the certain details about a story. The answers are covered with the acronym WWWWWH. That’s Who, What, When, Where, Why, and How.

  • WHO is involved in the story?
  • WHAT happened?
  • WHEN did it happen?
  • WHERE did it happen?
  • WHY did it happen?
  • HOW did it happen?

If you answer those questions you have told the reader most of what they want to know. Everything else is details.

Applying Questions in Life

Questions Drive Creative SolutionsI’ve kept that idea and tried to apply it to my life. In general I try to use questions as much as possible to learn, to discover, and to get clarity.

Sometimes I ask those questions of others. Most of the time I ask them of myself.

As a leader, we need to question ourselves often. Not the questions of doubt and deceit. Those are the questions that are meant to tear down; to break down our confidence, destroy our purpose, and rationalize choosing the easier path.

The questions we need to ask are ones that build, that focus, that reinforce our confidence, reaffirm our purpose, and show us a path no matter the difficulty. According to John Maxwell, author of Good Leaders Ask Great Questions, asking questions provides several benefits:

  1. You Only Get Answers to Questions You Ask

    Seems obvious, right? But amazing how often we don’t ask questions about what we want or need to know.

  2. Questions Unlock and Open Doors that Otherwise Remain Closed

    Peter Drucker once said, “My greatest strength as a consultant is to be ignorant and ask a few questions.”

  3. Questions Are the Most Effective Means of Connecting With People

    Have you ever stopped to ask directions from a stranger, say when your GPS is lying to you? How many told you to go away without giving you directions? Not many I would bet. A simple question generates interest.

  4. Questions Cultivate Humility

    When I was fresh out of college with my degree, I felt I had to have all the answers so I never asked questions. The more I learned, the more I learned what I don’t know. Questions help me discover that even more but helps me learn faster.

  5. Questions Help You Engage Others in Conversations

    Look at talk show hosts. Their entire existence revolves around asking questions of celebrities to start a conversation.

  6. Questions Allow Us to Build Better Ideas

    What we discover from others leads to great things. When I work with clients I use this to help them improve their workplace.

  7. Questions Give Us Different Perspective

    When we want to do things differently we have to see things differently and overcome our assumptions.

  8. Questions Challenge Mind-Sets and Get You Out of Ruts

    We settle into the familiar. Asking questions like “why” and “why not” can disrupt our status quo.

Start with Questioning Yourself

I recently read a blog about the 11 Questions You Should Ask Yourself Every Day. It was impactful and insightful. Unfortunately, it is on a subscription service and I am not able to share it here. If you want to find it yourself, the subscription program is called Maximum Impact Mentoring.

That was 11 questions and that may seem a bit much. Most of us complain we don’t even have time for breakfast, much less time time to go through a bunch of questions every day. Eventually you want to get there but in the meantime…

Let’s Go Simple

The statesman and philosopher Benjamin Franklin has been said to guide his life by asking himself two questions. In the morning he would ask himself, “what good will I do today?” and then in the evening before going to bed he would ask “what good did I do today?

Simple and if you think that’s enough for you, that’s great, go for it. If you want it more customized to your role as a leader, however, let’s try something else. For best results, I recommend keeping a journal. Use Evernote (my favorite), a diary app, or just a spiral notebook or composition book. Every day, set aside 5-10 minutes and ask these questions. Modify them based on whether you do this in the morning or evening.

  • What did I learn yesterday (today)?
  • How did I add value yesterday (today)?
  • Who do I need to recognize today (tomorrow)?
  • How will I focus on my strengths today (tomorrow)?
  • Who will I show appreciation to today (tomorrow)? 

Do you ask a lot of questions? How did not asking questions cost you? How can you make sure you lead with questions?

Share your comments here or email me at psimkins@BoldlyLead.com.

Growth Occurs Out of Change

The hardest decisions we make are the ones that can lead to the greatest growth.

Our family enjoys our Tower Gardens. We buy very little produce at the store now because of what we get off the towers. Lettuces, tomatoes, bell peppers, herbs, strawberries, and eggplant among many others. It all grows in large quantities when we pay a little attention to them.

pruning helps your garden be more fruitfulMaintenance of the garden somehow became primarily my realm. One of the things I have to do is trim back plants, calledpruning“. The idea is that you can help a plant become more fruitful by cutting back dead leaves and branches as well as areas where branches are growing out too much. When the plant doesn’t have to spend a lot of energy trying to maintain dead or overgrown branches, it can focus instead on flowering and growing it’s fruit.

The Struggle to Change

I have a hard time with pruning back, especially when the plant seems to be doing so well. Like my eggplant. LIttle buds all over the place that can potentially turn into eggplant. While I KNOW that pruning back is necessary to foster growth and make the remaining fruit better, I also deal with the hesitation of making the wrong choice and ruining the whole dynamic of the plant. I am afraid if I make the wrong choice that somehow I will kill the plant.

Realistically, I know the only way I could really do that would be to hack the thing down to nothing. But the hesitation is there anyway. Yet hidden among all the overgrowth is sometimes a lot of fruit waiting to develop.

Where is Growth Hiding for You?

Comfort and stability are the enemies of increasing our team productivity and growth. As our team becomes more familiar and settles into a system or process; things become more habit or rote. We no longer remember the core of who we are or what we are; we simply keep doing it because it looks good and feels good. We may be bearing some fruit but not as much as we could be or should be.

[tweetthis hidden_hashtags=”#BoldlyLead” display_mode=”box”]Comfort and stability are the enemies of increasing our team productivity.[/tweetthis]

As a leader we should spend more time looking for the indicators that we have gotten too comfortable. When productivity starts to level off, new ideas are not coming forward as often, and statements like “that’s not the way we do it.” pop up, it’s time to look at how things can change.

Pruning for Growth

This is time to break out those pruning shears and start to work. And guess where you are going to start?

Take a look at how you might be causing or contributing to the current situation. Are you engaged in any practices that you have comfortably settled in to? Are you hesitant to elicit or support change for fear of disturbing the status quo? Have you moved away from the open door to suggestions and ideas?

Prune back those areas within yourself to more readily see where things can be improved. The more you can see, the easier the pruning becomes for the rest of the process.

Keep in mind that when we talk about pruning back, we are almost never talking about pruning back people but rather what the people do. In fact, it’s usually the opposite; instead of looking at who we can do without we look for how we can have them provide more. How can we can the most out of the strengths of our team members? What do we need to change for that to happen?

eggplant from our tower gardenHidden Fruit

If you want to know the outcome of the eggplant pruning, I forced myself to do a little bit of cutting back on the overgrowth. Not a lot, just a little. Hidden behind all that overgrowth was some very hearty eggplant fruit. Who knew?

Where do you see the need for pruning back for yourself? How about for your team or organization?

Share your thoughts here or you can email me at psimkins@BoldlyLead.com

Influencing Culture

What if…

What you do and what you say in every situation made a difference?

Of course, you know what’s coming next.

It does!

Two things inspired me to write this today.

First, I was reading my morning devotional. It was Esther 4.

Book of Esther pictureIf you are not a person of faith before you stray away: there is a valuable lesson in here for everyone.

In the story, the Jews are facing annihilation at the hands of Haman through his influence on King Xerxes. Mordecai, a Jew, had managed to get his cousin Esther, also a Jew, placed as Queen. Mordecai sends her a message to intervene with the King on behalf of the Jews but doing so could endanger Esther’s life and she hesitates, doubting her influence.

Mordecai’s response moved her: “Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?

How would that hit you?

That one moment where she doubts she has influence and doubts she can make a difference is where she ends up having a huge impact and makes the biggest difference of all!

Secondly, I read a blog post from my mentor John C. Maxwell, also talking about influence

He also says those moments when we don’t think about who or how we influence is where we can have the greatest influence. The chance encounters, the seemingly insignificant.

[tweetthis hidden_hashtags=”#culturecounts” display_mode=”box”]We think about major moments so much that we forget that minor moments count as well.[/tweetthis]

Think about those moments and think about your day so far

Image of Influence Network

Are there moments you miss? What about your family this morning as everyone woke up? The person behind the counter at the coffee shop? The security guard at the front door to the office? The co-worker you walked by this morning?

In every circumstance, our choices help create examples for others to mirror. For example, most people will smile back at you if you smile at them. By making those same choices consistently, we encourage it in others, and that helps build culture.

Therefore, culture is created, it doesn’t just evolve. We help shape culture by our thoughts, our words, and our actions.

[tweetthis hidden_hashtags=”#CultureCounts #Ahhamoment”]Our daily choices influence culture in every circumstance.[/tweetthis]

What if you were in a particular time and place for such a time as this?

What if this person or group was where your influence counted the most?

What will your next choice be?

What thoughts and suggestions do you have to help others shape culture?

Inspired Leaders Have GRIT

On October 10, 2014 I was blessed to be a host for L2:Learn-Lead, the new annual leadership simulcast produced by the John Maxwell Company.  In the last post, I shared the opening keynote by John C. Maxwell to initiate this series.  Today, I want to share some of the thoughts from Linda Kaplan Thaler.

About Linda

Linda Kaplan ThalerLinda is the co-founder and head of Publicis Kaplan Thaler, a marketing and advertising firm.  She is definitely a leader within her industry; creative and innovative.  She knows how to get things done.  Among the many claims to fame she has is the creation of the Kodak Moment, the AFLAC Duck, and the Toys R Us Kid jingle.  She is also co-author of a few books, including The Power of Nice: How to Conquer the Business World with Kindness.

GRIT Creates Extraordinary

Linda spoke on GRIT: How Ordinary People Become Extraordinary.  GRIT is an acronym for Guts, Resilience, Industriousness, and Tenacity.  Here are some of Linda’s thoughts from her talk:
  • 98% of highly successful people were considered average.
    • Walt Disney was fired from his first job for being “uncreative”
    • General Colin Powell was a C- student
    • Michael Jordan wasn’t good enough to make his high school varsity basketball team
    • What makes the difference is their GRIT.
[snaptweet]Anyone with perseverance and pluck can go from ordinary to extraordinary. -Linda Kaplan Thaler[/snaptweet]
  • If you are brave enough, stop dreaming and start doing!
[snaptweet]I never spent one minute dreaming about success. I worked for it. -Estee Lauder[/snaptweet]
  • Overprepare and outwork everyone else
  • We get easily distracted and need to refocus on where we are going.

Four Keys to Help Stay on Track

  1. SOLVE SMALL PROBLEMS – when you resolve the small problems that pop up regularly, it prepares you to solve the big problems.
  2. MAKE YOUR BED – Military recruits are taught early on how to make their bed first thing every morning and to make it neat and precise.  Part of the reason is discipline but a good deal of it is that you accomplished something immediately.  If you accomplish nothing else that day, you made your bed.
  3. FINISH WHAT YOU START – With busy schedules and competing priorities, it’s easy to jump from one thing to another and not really finish anything.  Successful people finish.
  4. FORGET WILLPOWER – No one has enough willpower to stay the course consistently simply based on their will.  Develop habits and create situations that take willpower out of the equation.
Next post will cover Tim Sanders thoughts from L2:Learn-Lead.

Action Items:

  1. How will you apply this to your life?
  2. What do you need to change?
  3. What should you share or teach to others?