Leading with Love

Tis the Season

Christmas is love. Dog Jack Russell Terrier in a house decorated with a Christmas tree and gifts wishes happy Holiday and Christmas EveLove at Christmas. Even people who aren’t particularly faithful will celebrate Christmas.  We give gifts, we buy gifts for others, we receive gifts from others, we spend a lot of time with family.  And we celebrate Christmas because of the importance of the event and what it means to us; even people who don’t follow it very strongly really understand what Christmas is all about.
At the core, what Christmas is really all about is LOVE!  It’s about how we love others!
And this is the opportunity that it presents to us:  the opportunity to love others.  To put the focus on other people for at least a little bit of time so we can care for them and add value to them.

The Every Day Season

That same attitude we employ during this season is what drives our relationships the rest of the year. To Boldly Lead people follows an essential process.
  1. We CARE for people
  2. So can then CONNECT with them
  3. In order to INFLUENCE them
  4. Setting us up to LEAD them
So it starts with caring. Yet here’s the catch.
You cannot care for anyone you don’t love.

Love in Business – that’s Weird!

Now it may seem odd using that word in the context of leadership and business. Yet it depends greatly on how you define it. If you only think of love in romantic terms then this seems really….weird. And perhaps a little disturbing. And in light of recent events and public revelations of inappropriate behavior it may even seem career killing.
But there is more than one way to love others. In fact, in an article in Psychology Today, author Dr. Neel Burton outlines seven types of love.
  1. Eros – Romantic
  2. Philia – Friendship
  3. Storge – Familial
  4. Agape – universal or charitable
  5. Ludus – playful or uncommitted (think flirting)
  6. Pragma – practical love, born of reason or duty
  7. Philautia – Self-love, i.e., your self-esteem and confidence

Try a Business Related Love

In his book Love is the Killer App, Tim Sanders defines a workplace related love. He calls it BizLove. It would most closely related to Pragma but also Philautia plays a part.
BizLove means that you engage in the sensible sharing of intangibles to promote other people’s growth. In other words, the growth and development of your people is your primary concern.
In order to do that, you must have a good enough self-esteem and confidence that you don’t feel threatened by the growth of others. And it means that you regard caring for others important enough to make it a priority and a daily event.
Look at it this way, Everyone on your team has improved their ability to contribute and applied that to team goals or organizational goals. How does that improve your team? Your organization? How does it increase YOUR value?
[tweetthis]Love creates the circumstances by which we excel, particularly by helping others excel.[/tweetthis]

Love Applied

So here’s a few things that I want you to do during this holiday season to really celebrate what Christmas is all about and share that love. This will set the stage for practicing your BizLove as well.
  1. Do something for someone else who can never pay you back.  Focus on that, look to do that daily; something for someone who can never pay you back.  That’s what love really means; when you don’t expect a reward or a payback, what can you do for others.
  2. Take time out from the gift giving to appreciate the gift of everyone you encounter.  What’s special about the people you spend your time and relationships with?  Tell them.  Tell them what they mean to you and that will make a world of difference to them!
  3. Look around you and appreciate the LOVE that the creator has shown you by surrounding you with blessings!  Even when you don’t necessarily see them.

I hope you have a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Want to help spread the message of love in your organization? Book me to speak at your next gathering. Contact me at psimkins(at)BoldlyLead.com for more details.

Enter the Holidays!

Well, we’ve come up on that time of year where people the world over are celebrating this great event:  Christmas. Even people who aren’t particularly faithful will celebrate Christmas.  We give gifts, we buy gifts for others, we receive gifts from others, we spend a lot of time with family.  And we celebrate Christmas because of the importance of the event and what it means to us; even people who don’t follow it very strongly really understand what Christmas is all about.
Most of us, at least, take a break from our daily working and driving to success to get in a little down-time and relax.  Still there are many that can’t (or mostly won’t) even take a break for one day.  The entrepreneurial mantra is that you are working every day, even on holidays.

Questioning Your Motives

But one question to ask yourself is WHY.
  • WHY are you sacrificing relationships for your work?
  • WHY are willing to put everything else aside to achieve your goal?
  • WHY is it important?
  • WHY are you not able to take a brief respite from driving towards success?
And then one big WHAT question to ask:
  • WHAT is the REAL reason you are driven to meet your goal or achieve success?

Is it to serve yourself or to serve others?  Is it out of deep caring and concern or a need for personal achievement?

I have written before about self-fulfillment motives versus being motivated by the service you  provide.  The key to focusing on serving others is to really, sincerely care for others and believe in others and seek to add value to others.

At the core, what we do has to apply a little bit of the REAL meaning of Christmas to the rest of our lives.

See, at the core, what Christmas is really all about is LOVE!  It’s about how we love others!  How we care for them and nurture them and seek to help them achieve their best.
And this is the opportunity that our purpose presents to us:  the opportunity to love others.  To put the focus on other people in our daily activities – not just once a year but throughout the year – so we can care for them and add value to them.
So here’s a few things that I want you to take from this holiday season apply throughout your life and the coming year to share that love.
  1. Do something for someone else who can never pay you back.  Focus on that, look to do that daily; something for someone who can never pay you back.  That’s what love really means; when you don’t expect a reward or a payback, what can you do for others.
  2. Take time out to appreciate the gift of everyone you encounter.  What’s special about the people you spend your time and relationships with?  Tell them.  Tell them what they mean to you and that will make a world of difference to them!
  3. Look around you and appreciate the LOVE that the creator has shown you by surrounding you with blessings!  Even when you don’t necessarily see them.

You have to see value to add value.  That takes time and reflection.  Focus on the value around you and the opportunity to make it every greater.

That’s your success in 2014!